i was like – oh my god, they were roommates

I read a book about a blue crayon that was born in a red wrapper and who everyone was trying to force to be red last week? Which, like. Obvious message. And I grabbed a book at the last minute that looked cute for today and it ended up being about a bear who felt like he was in the wrong body because he really wanted to be a bunny and his heart was light and happy like bunny giggles.

so, like.

welcome to Ms. Chelsea’s Indoctrination Hour

today we continue our lesson in how to grow up to be a decent goddamn human

talking through specific childhood stuff and, like, things your parents did with a therapist who verified that these things weren’t healthy or okay is… …validating but also upsetting, because now I have to Deal With More Things

oh no a lady just politely ranted at me about all the pornography that we carry at the library and how she can’t take her teenage son into the adult section without seeing “women’s breasts hanging out on book spines” and “i can’t believe all the trash you carry” and “didn’t the library used to be a safe space” all while smiling and

i was just like

*polite smile* “oh?” because i’m…i didn’t choose the books…i didn’t…i mean, i would have chosen those books, the library is a safe space for everyone including people who read erotica?? but they didn’t ask me

but also

your teenage son is probably seeing more than half-naked women in other places, lady, have you heard about The Internet, i write the kind of trash that you think is ruining ur son there on the daily